Final week I went to a somewhat good celebration. I wore a black satin costume, leopard-print heels, plenty of eyeliner and my lengthy, blonde hair unfastened in tumbling waves and curls.
Properly, I say ‘my’ hair. However till the day earlier than, my locks had been hanging on a rack in a hairdressing salon in Battersea. As a result of the shiny, swishy mane you may see in the primary image, proper, is the results of 5 hours of sitting in a salon, whereas a specialist painstakingly scorching‑glued tiny bunches of actual hair to my very own stumpy locks.
And you recognize what? It was value each minute. Not simply because I really like the way in which it seems, however as a result of for the primary time in lots of months, I now not see most cancers each time I look within the mirror.
Final November, I wrote on this newspaper about how I’d been recognized with a extremely aggressive type of breast most cancers. It was a terrifying shock. I believed I might die. I would wish pressing remedy, together with intensive chemotherapy, if I had been to outlive.
Final week I went to a somewhat good celebration. I wore a black satin costume, leopard-print heels, plenty of eyeliner and my lengthy, blonde hair unfastened in tumbling waves and curls
A 12 months later, I’ve lastly reached the tip of remedy. I’ve endured eight rounds of chemotherapy, a double mastectomy with implant reconstructions, had all my lymph nodes faraway from my proper armpit, had three weeks of day by day radiotherapy and 18 therapies with focused immunotherapy to attempt to stop the most cancers from coming again.
The miraculous information is that all of it appears to have labored. The chemotherapy destroyed all traces of detectable most cancers earlier than I even had surgical procedure.
And my new lease of life makes me much more decided to wring each ounce of pleasure out of life.
Some ladies are so petrified of hair loss they refuse chemotherapy
I’ve all the time beloved the festive interval, particularly making traditions for my household; and having completed my remedy, this 12 months the entire thing feels additional particular.
I’ve booked as many occasions as I can, from opera at Covent Backyard to journeys to go to pals within the nation. However whereas I used to be determined to place most cancers firmly prior to now, the ghost of the illness haunted me every time I noticed my reflection. For a lot of most cancers sufferers, the tip of remedy will be an unexpectedly troublesome time.
Not simply because I really like the way in which it seems, however as a result of for the primary time in lots of months, I now not see most cancers each time I look within the mirror
I yearn to be — and seem like — the identical particular person I used to be earlier than all this occurred to me.
After all, I can by no means actually return. I can’t undo the previous. I bear everlasting scars, and whereas I select to consider I’m cured, I reside with the persistent undertow of fear that my most cancers would possibly come again.
Issues that remind me of most cancers, such because the delicate joggers and tees I wore throughout my hours of chemo, fill me with revulsion. However the change that upset me most was my hair.
A bald head is likely one of the most distinctive options of a lady going by means of chemotherapy for breast most cancers. TV presenter Sarah Beeney just lately bravely debuted her personal naked scalp. However for most ladies, the thought of dropping their hair — all their hair, together with eyebrows and lashes — is likely one of the worst issues a couple of breast most cancers prognosis, much more upsetting than the prospect of a mastectomy.
My marketing consultant instructed me that ‘Will I lose my hair?’ is likely one of the first questions most of his sufferers ask after a prognosis. And a few ladies, astonishingly, even refuse chemotherapy, because the prospect of going bald is so daunting.
Whereas I wasn’t in in the slightest degree ashamed of getting most cancers, I didn’t ever wish to look as if I had it. I had my brows tattooed at Tracie Giles’s London clinic.
I utilized lash serums continually and, throughout chemotherapy, I used a tool known as a ‘cold-cap’. This contraption cools the scalp inflicting blood vessels to constrict, stopping a number of the poisonous medication in my system reaching the hair follicles. It labored brilliantly for fairly a very long time.
My mane grew to become, by final Christmas, a cute, curly, jaw-length bob. However because the onslaught continued, I misplaced increasingly more hair, and by my final remedy in February, I used to be left with skinny, dry, damaged hair over my scalp and some longer, wispy strands on the again which I dragged into what I optimistically regarded as a bun.
At first my follicles appeared poisoned into inactivity. However as time went on, my hair began to develop again.
It was thick, unruly and . . . very quick. It sprang upwards out of my scalp on the crown, the desiccated ends shaped a dandelion clock halo within the slightest breeze and tight curls crept down the nape of my neck to kind a mullet.
Final summer time I approached a big London salon about getting extensions, however was turned away as my hair was too quick. I used to be bitterly upset. As an alternative, I had my hair restyled by way of a charity known as Hair Reborn, which gives free cuts to folks combating their hair after most cancers remedy.
Individuals instructed me how stylish my new type was and the way cool and sensible throughout the summer time’s heatwave. I reminded myself of all the gorgeous and classy ladies on the planet with quick hair, corresponding to Audrey Hepburn and Sharon Stone. However the fact was, I missed my outdated hair.
Hair grows, on common, half an inch a month, or six inches a 12 months. The considered having to attend years to get my pre-cancer look again was miserable, particularly as I flip 60 subsequent 12 months.
Individuals prompt wigs, however I do a whole lot of yoga and I couldn’t think about a wig surviving a downward canine. I felt that most cancers had bullied me fairly sufficient and I wasn’t going to let a illness determine my hair type.
So, after I heard a couple of specialist who not solely provided a number of the smallest, most natural-looking ‘micro-bonds’ within the UK, however who was ready to tackle the problem of turning my stumpy locks into luxurious waves, I rushed to make an appointment.
The Extensionist is a tiny salon in South London which, on the day I visited, was heaving with purchasers. Proprietor Olia Cutz is a tiny, ballerina-like 37-year-old from Latvia with a sheet of pale blonde hair right down to her waist — which after all, seems to be extensions.
Her purchasers embrace twentysomething Instagram influencers, fashions, TV reporters, stay-at-home mums and the stylish, grey-haired skilled lady within the subsequent chair to mine.
The hair Olia makes use of for extensions is all actual, Brazilian or Slavic hair sourced from Japanese Europe. She says the struggle in Ukraine has hit provides of Russian and Ukrainian locks. I used to be inquisitive about the place, and who, all this hair got here from.
Olia reassured me that the hair she makes use of comes from trusted, moral suppliers who pay ladies pretty. She stopped utilizing Russian hair after the invasion of Ukraine, and by no means makes use of any from Vietnam and China the place the commerce, she says, is ‘brutal’.
Olia fastidiously colour-matches lengthy swatches to my very own hair and units to work. In the long run she applies 250 g or nearly 9 oz of hair, which she divides into tiny sections, then bonds to my hair with keratin, a pure hair protein, melted with particular heated pliers.
On the nape of the neck and crown she is ready to add bigger tape extensions. I’m within the salon from 5pm to 10pm. However fortunately Olia is humorous, gossipy and good, and we’ve a whale of a time.
I inform her that, at my age, I’m not out there for Rapunzel tresses, however I would really like hair like fellow fiftysomething Jennifer Aniston. Olia will get it right away.
To say I really like the result’s an understatement. It’s not fairly excellent but: if I don’t clean down the bouncy new progress with serum and curl my hair, I can see the place the quick and lengthy strands meet. However the longer my very own hair will get, the higher the impact shall be.
I can’t put on my hair up, as this may reveal the shorter hairs on the nape of my neck the place the extensions finish, however I can put on a low ponytail or plait. In three months, I’ll have the bonds dissolved and the extensions repositioned nearer to the roots.
As a result of my hair is so quick, I’m, says Olia, one of the crucial difficult transformations she has ever performed. However I’m not the one post-chemo consumer she’s had — I almost wrote affected person as a substitute of consumer, as a result of this looks like a remedy in addition to a deal with.
She hates to show anybody away and her salons supply bespoke human hair alternative techniques — a type of super-wig — for ladies who’ve misplaced all their hair.
The response has been overwhelmingly optimistic. My husband loves it. ‘You seem like you once more,’ he says.
My pals are thrilled. ‘You look wonderful!’ ‘Can I contact it?’ ‘Are you able to type it?’ ‘It seems identical to your personal hair!’
At a current check-up the nurse couldn’t consider that I’d had chemo — ‘You’ve got a lot hair.’ I confessed it wasn’t mine — although Olia tells me off for this. ‘I inform my purchasers, after all it’s your hair. You paid for it!’ she laughs.
And whereas quick hair will be extremely elegant, there’s a cause I by no means selected to chop my hair prior to now. Swishy locks make me really feel 1,000,000 occasions prettier and extra assured.
Relying on how briskly your hair grows, it will possibly take, says Olia, something as much as two years earlier than ladies really feel they don’t want their extensions any extra.
Nonetheless, the hair will be reused repeatedly, and it’s doable to get hooked on the youthful quantity they provide to mid-life ladies, even when your personal hair is sort of lengthy.
The primary night time I discover it onerous to sleep on the nubbly knots of keratin bonds throughout my scalp, and panic I’ve performed the mistaken factor. However by the subsequent night time, I barely discover the feeling.
Upkeep is sort of easy. I can wash my hair as regular, however should not go to mattress with it moist, lest it turn into matted. I must also plait it earlier than sleep for a similar cause.
The most important draw back of my new hair is the associated fee. Actual hair is pricey, and software is time-consuming, which suggests extensions begin at round £450.
However as a result of I wanted a lot hair, a change like mine prices about £800 — although that is related or lower than the price of human hair wig.
Three-monthly changes price from £250, although mine would possible be double that.
When my hair is lengthy sufficient, I plan to donate my extensions to a charity making wigs for youngsters affected by most cancers.
And sure, I do know that is loopy cash throughout a cost-of-living disaster, however the impact on my self‑esteem is priceless.
Plus, I’ve realised that I saved tons of of kilos throughout remedy as a result of I finished getting my common minimize and color (root cowl and highlights) for over a 12 months — and I used to be paying about £170 a time.
Final 12 months, my life as I knew it got here to a juddering halt. Now I wish to embrace each second of 2023, swishing my hair as I’m going.
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